Hey O!

Hello there Pres. O! Money, sex, lies, power, murder, corruption, war, blood, oil. Welcome to the party. Don't worry you don't have to do all of that today, thats a lot to live up too. After all you can't do eight years in one day. First things first, your going to need a chili-cheese dog. No need to take the limo, just hop onto Rainbow your pet unicorn. You'll get there in no time. Just stay away from the lollipops otherwise you'll never get anywhere, Rainbow just loves lollipops. But once you get your chili-cheese dog you can get on your way. What's that O Rainbow feel into the lollipop well? That's not a lollipop well silly. Thats a gateway to Hell that Dick used to go home. But no worries the metal grate was in place so its really just a barbecue. Don't look glum O. Your not seeing the bright side, now you can feed the poor! Just pull out old Rainbow's corpse out of the barbecue well. See look at that corpse, the skin is crispy, nice grill marks, and great colour. You never said you were also Master Chef and Pit Master O. Now that's talent. TIme to carve up Rainbow, don't worry the train just rolled in and the Joe can help you carve. Here have some giant white chef hats. This is a great photo op! Just cut Rainbow down the middle and you can both carve, just hold the fork and knife and start slicing along the muscles, just follow the lines. Great work O, now its time to serve up some sliced unicorn. Be glad smile, you know Rainbow would have done the same for you. There put some unicorn on their plates, feed the people O! They'll be shitting and throwing up rainbows for a week. Thats a great start O! Feeding the hungry, instead of roasting them, and serving them up at a luncheon for the rich. It was the style of the time, oil was cheap and blood was murder. Time for a change, maybe solar power? Doesn't matter though your in O. So put on a new record, pour some drinks, smoke some doobies, put your feet up. Take it all in O, are you having a good time?
Welcome to the party.

-Drew